Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Airport Screening Results

January Statistics On Airport Screening From The Department Of Homeland Security:

Terrorists Discovered 0
Transvestites 133
Hernias 1,485
Hemorrhoid Cases 3,172
Enlarged Prostates 8,249
Breast Implants 59,350
Natural Blondes 3

It was also discovered that 535 members of Congress had no balls.

Thank you dgj.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Why Condoms Come In Boxes of 3, 6, & 12

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son.
They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, "What are these, Dad?

To which the man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called Condoms son. Men use them to have safe sex."

"Oh I see," replied the boy pensively.
Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school."
He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks, "Why are there 3 in this package?"

The dad replies, "Those are for high school boys, one For Friday, one for Saturday, and one for Sunday."

"Cool" says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and
Asks, "Then who are these for?"

"Those are for college men," the dad answers, TWO For Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday."

"WOW!" exclaimed the boy, "then who uses THESE?" he asks, picking Up a 12 pack. With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied,
"Those are for married men. One for January, one for February, one For March......."

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

MegaVote

Congress.org (congress.org) presents: M E G A V O T E May 21, 2012

In this MegaVote for Georgia's 13th Congressional District:

Recent Congressional Votes -
* Senate: Paul Budget Resolution
* Senate: Lee Budget Resolution
* Senate: Agency Confirmation
* Senate: Agency Confirmation
* Senate: Export-Import Bank Reauthorization
* Senate: Obama Budget Resolution
* Senate: Ryan Budget Resolution
* Senate: Toomey Budget Resolution
* House: Violence Against Women Act Reauthorization
* House: Suspension Vote: Iran Sanctions Resolution
* House: Flood Insurance Extension
* House: National Defense Authorization, FY 2013 Upcoming Congressional Bills -
* Senate: Food and Drug Administration Safety and Innovation Act

Editor's Note:  The House is in recess this week.

Recent Senate Votes:

Paul Budget Resolution
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=100&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Rejected (16-83, 1 Not Voting)
This budget resolution from Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., would set new FY 2013 budget authority at $3.084 trillion. According to the Senator, his resolution would balance the budget in five years and cut the national deficit by $2 trillion over ten years. It introduces means-testing requirements to Social Security and raises the retirement age to 70 by 2032. It would also means-test Medicare and raise the age of eligibility to 70 over a 20-year window. Senior citizens would be permitted to enroll in the Federal Employee Health Benefits Plan used by congressional Members and staff. The resolution would set a flat tax rate of 17 percent for all individuals and businesses and eliminate all credits and deductions except the child credit and mortgage interest deduction.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO
Senators believe in incremental change, such a big change is frightening to this bunch of pussies. If the Democrats thought the Republicans were serious about such proposals you would start to see some of that Harry Reid manipulation fall away.  This is stuff the Tea Party can sink it's teeth into if it could get synchronized with the the Libertarians.  Disappointing guys, show some courage to affect real change, a paradigm shift is what is needed.

Lee Budget Resolution
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=101&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Rejected (17-82, 1 Not Voting) The budget resolution from Sen. Mike Lee, R-Utah, would set new FY 2013 budget authority at $3.269 trillion. It purports to balance the budget by 2017 through myriad changes to entitlements and the tax code as well as reducing spending to 17.8 percent of GDP over ten years. It would establish a single 25% tax rate for individuals and businesses while eliminating the payroll, estate, and any investment taxes. Social Security would be means-tested and the retirement age would rise to 68. Medicare participants would be able to enroll in a premium-support or voucher program. Total Medicare spending would be capped at the level of the Consumer Price Index plus one percent. Medicaid would become a block grant program. Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO
I love the means testing ideas, the problem is these guys don't like to be measured by potential impact choices, they keep the problem described in the broader scope so the middle is left for compromise, and pork.

Agency Confirmation
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=102&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Confirmed (70-24, 6 Not Voting) The Senate voted to confirm the nomination of Jeremy C. Stein of Massachusetts to the Federal Reserve Board of Governors.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO
I don't know Jeremy Stein from Ben Stein, no doubt there are abundant credentials. The thing that causes me doubt is the unanimous Democratic vote.

Agency Confirmation
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=103&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Confirmed (74-21, 5 Not Voting) The Senate voted to confirm the nomination of Jerome H. Powell of Maryland to the Federal Reserve Board of Governors.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO
What's the deal Georgia guys, why are you being so negative?

Export-Import Bank Reauthorization
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=96&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Passed (78-20, 2 Not Voting) This bill would extend the charter of the Export-Import Bank of the United States through FY 2014. It would allow the banks lending limit to rise incrementally to $140 billion (from $100 billion currently). Following House passage last week, the Senate cleared this bill for the presidents signature, narrowly avoiding the May 31 expiration of the banks charter. Passage followed several failed amendment votes, among them a vote to terminate the bank within one year.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted YES
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted YES
Who cares?

Obama Budget Resolution
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=97&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Rejected (0-99, 1 Not Voting)
The Senate unanimously rejected this budget resolution, which was the GOPs interpretation of President Obamas FY 13 budget proposal. It would set new FY 2013 budget authority at $2.982 trillion. This marks the second time Senate Republicans have introduced what they call the presidents budget for a floor vote, and the second time the proposal has failed to garner a single yea vote. This was the first of five budget resolutions the Senate voted on last week, each one a messaging vote since both chambers have already set spending levels for their respective FY 13 appropriations bills.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO
Classic.

Ryan Budget Resolution
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=98&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Rejected (41-58, 1 Not Voting)
In another reprisal of last years budget theater, the House-passed budget drafted by Rep. Paul D. Ryan, R-Wis., failed in a party-line Senate vote. The resolution would set new FY 2013 budget authority at $2.794 trillion. As happened last year, all Democrats voted nay along with Independents Bernard Sanders (Vt.) and Joseph I. Lieberman (Conn.). All Republicans voted yay with the exceptions of Sens. Scott P. Brown (Mass.), Susan Collins (Maine), Dean Heller (Nev.), Rand Paul (Ky.) and Olympia J. Snowe (Maine).
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted YES
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted YES
The Democrats are united in their stand to make Paul Ryan look like the oppressor of the downtrodden.  Obama has gone out of his way to slap him around in the press.  The thing is, is that Ryan has offered to be flexible and the Democrats are not offering substantive options, they want what they want and revenues be damned, they'll keep blaming the revenue shortfall on Republicans trying to save the rich.  Which is all bullshit and every one of the bastards know it. Ryan's plan is competent and addresses known problems, I hope the people can see that this is a reasonable plan or at least start for change in slope.

Toomey Budget Resolution
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=99&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Rejected (42-57, 1 Not Voting)
This budget resolution introduced by Sen. Pat Toomey, R-Pa. would set new FY 2013 budget authority at $2.843 trillion. It purports to create a balanced budget within eight years, in part by reducing spending to about 18.3 percent of GDP. It would also create a two-thirds supermajority requirement for votes to exceed discretionary spending levels set forth in the resolution and a three-fifths supermajority to make any advance appropriation unless the latter are for a handful of accounts at the Veterans Affairs Administration.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted YES
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted YES
The same old Yankee Rinos, making the Dems look stronger than they are.


Recent House Votes:

Violence Against Women Act Reauthorization http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=258&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (222-205, 4 Not Voting) The House last week passed its version of a reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA). Originally passed in 1994, the bill had been reauthorized twice without controversy until this year. The Senate version (S 1925), passed April 26, created several new provisions to which the House objected, such as expanding protections to include LGBT victims. President Obama has threatened to veto the House bill. While it looked like the two bills were headed to a conference committee following House passage, it was discovered late last week that the Senate bill contained a revenue-raising provision, causing the House to raise constitutional objections. The path forward at this point is not clear.
Rep. David Scott voted NO
Political crap, putting poison pills into well intentioned legislation.

Suspension Vote: Iran Sanctions Resolution http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=261&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (401-11, 9 Present, 10 Not Voting) In a shot across the bow of world leaders gathered last weekend for the G8 Summit, the House loudly expressed its position on Iran. While reiterating that it is a vital national interest of the United States to prevent Iran from acquiring a nuclear capability, the resolution also comes down firmly against any proposed containment policy. Debate has raged about what U.S. red lines are with regard to Irans uranium enrichment program, and there is some question as to what exactly a nuclear capability would mean. If it means having a certain amount of enriched uranium, for example, that is a much different standard than having the ability to arm a missile with a nuclear warhead. Perhaps with that in mind, the resolution also demands that Iran end its ballistic missile program.
Rep. David Scott voted YES
I like it, thank you Mr. Scott.

Flood Insurance Extension
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=262&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (402-18, 11 Not Voting) Hoping to avoid a May 31 expiration date, the House passed a short-term extension of the National Flood Insurance Program. The bill would extend the programs authorization through June 30, allowing homeowners living in flood zones to purchase private insurance. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., attempted to pass a different extension last week by unanimous consent, but Sen. Tom Coburn, R-Okla., objected. Republicans in both chambers want a complete overhaul of the program in exchange for a multi-year extension.
Rep. David Scott voted YES
Damn skippy the crap needs to be revised.  I suspect though that the Republicans have something else in mind when they propose revision.  I think the flood insurance is applied to too many known "at risk" properties.   

National Defense Authorization, FY 2013
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=291&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (299-120, 12 Not Voting) The House passed its version of the annual defense policy bill last week following two days of debate and dozens of amendments. The bill would provide $643 billion for FY 13, including $88.5 billion for the war in Afghanistan. The topline figure exceeds agreed-upon spending levels from last years Budget Control Act (PL 112-25) by $8 billion. Amendment debate ranged widely, from the sale of fighter jets to Taiwan to the detention of terrorism suspects arrested on U.S. soil. President Obama has issued a veto threat on this bill. The Senate Armed Services Committee is slated to mark up its version this week.
Rep. David Scott voted YES
You had a good week Mr. Scott.  If Obama has threatened to veto, that puts the Senate in a spot, usually that is a clue for Reid to table, this they cannot.

Upcoming Votes:
Food and Drug Administration Safety and Innovation Act - S.3187 The Senate is scheduled to hold a cloture vote on the motion to proceed to this bill, which would reauthorize FDA user fees.

MegaVote is powered by the CQ-Roll Call Group (http://corporate.cqrollcall.com) Copyright (c) 2012.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

MegaVote


Congress.org (congress.org) presents:  M E G A V O T E  for May 14, 2012

In this MegaVote for Georgia's 13th Congressional District:

Recent Congressional Votes -
* Senate: Judicial Confirmation
* Senate: Cloture Motion: Student Loan Interest Rates
* House: Suspension Vote: Export-Import Bank Reauthorization
* House: Suspension Vote: U.S.-Israel Cooperation
* House: Sequester Replacement
* House: Commerce-Justice-Science Appropriations, FY 2013

Upcoming Congressional Bills -
* Senate: Export-Import Bank Reauthorization Act of 2012
* Senate: Stop the Student Loan Interest Rate Hike Act of 2012
* House: Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act of 2012
* House: National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2013

Recent Senate Votes:

Judicial Confirmation
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=88&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Confirmed (91-3, 6 Not Voting)
The Senate confirmed the nomination of Jacqueline H. Nguyen of California to the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals. 
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted  YES
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted  YES
I think it sucks that any person could agree with anything Leahy ever votes for or wants.

Cloture Motion: Student Loan Interest Rates
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=89&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Rejected (52-45, 1 Present, 2 Not Voting)
This bill would extend the current 3.4 percent interest rate on federally-subsidized Stafford loans to undergraduate students for one year. This extension would be paid for by eliminating a tax preference for certain shareholders of S-Corporations. The Senate failed to reach the 60-vote threshold needed to invoke cloture, and thereby end debate, on the motion to proceed to the bill. It is possible the Senate will hold another cloture vote on this bill. The House passed a competing version (H.R.4628) on April 27.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO
Let us find another way to suck up to potential voters, thank you guys for voting against cloture.
I paid all of my son's college tuition and board expenses, shouldn't I be reimbursed for the interest that I continue to pay on my home, that could have been reduced if it not for the unfair expense of education?
Recent House Votes:

Suspension Vote: Export-Import Bank Reauthorization
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=224&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (330-93, 8 Not Voting)
This bill would extend the charter of the Export-Import Bank of the United States through FY 2014. It would allow the bank's lending limit to rise incrementally to $140 billion (from $100 billion currently). HR 2072 passed under suspension of the rules, meaning the support of at least two thirds of all Members voting (in this case 282) is required for passage. The Senate will take up H.R.2072 on Monday, May 14, with a cloture vote scheduled.
Rep. David Scott voted Not Voting
Apparently David Scott had no more clue on this than I.
Suspension Vote: U.S.-Israel Cooperation
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=225&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (411-2, 9 Present, 9 Not Voting)
This bill states that it shall be U.S. policy to deepen cooperation with Israel in a wide variety of areas, particularly regarding Israels "qualitative military edge" over regional rivals; to veto anti-Israel resolutions at the United Nations; and to assist Israel in ongoing negotiations on a two-state solution. The bill also extends U.S.-government-backed loan guarantees to Israel through FY 2015. HR 4133 passed under suspension of the rules, meaning the support of at least two thirds of all Members voting (in this case 276) is required for passage.
Rep. David Scott voted YES
That's the right one David, thank you.
Sequester Replacement
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=247&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (218-199, 1 Present, 13 Not Voting)
This bill cancels the automatic discretionary spending cuts instituted by last year's debt-ceiling agreement and replaces those cuts with a different set of reductions to a variety of mandatory spending programs, as well as a reduction on the overall spending limit for all FY 2013 appropriations bills. The bill separately eliminates the cap on defense spending instituted by the debt-limit agreement to accommodate a higher level of spending in that area. The Senate is unlikely to take up this bill. The President has issued a veto threat.
Rep. David Scott voted NO
As much as I understand it the Democrats intend to drag ass on this subject, making defense cuts the bargaining chip needed to force a tax increase.
Commerce-Justice-Science Appropriations, FY 2013
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=249&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (247-163, 21 Not Voting)
This appropriations bill provides $51.1 billion dollars in funding in FY 2013 for the departments of Commerce and Justice and other agencies such as NASA and the National Science Foundation. This funding level would be $1.8 billion less than in FY 2012 and $731 million less than the president requested for the upcoming fiscal year. The Senate Appropriations Committee approved its version of the bill on April 19, but floor time has not been scheduled. The President has threatened a veto on the House version.
Rep. David Scott voted NO
Do you smell an effort to defund the Justice Department?

Upcoming Votes:
Export-Import Bank Reauthorization Act of 2012 - H.R.2072 
The Senate is scheduled to hold a cloture vote on the motion to proceed to this House-passed bill.

Stop the Student Loan Interest Rate Hike Act of 2012 - S.2343
The Senate will likely continue consideration of this bill, with another cloture vote possible.

Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act of 2012 - H.R.4970
The House will take up a reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act, which aims to foster cooperation among law enforcement, public health and other organizations in combating domestic violence and other crimes against women. The Senate passed its version on April 26.

National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2013 - H.R.4310
The House aims to pass its version of the annual defense policy bill.

MegaVote is powered by the CQ-Roll Call Group (http://corporate.cqrollcall.com)

Copyright (c) 2012.
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Monday, May 7, 2012

MegaVote

Congress.org (congress.org) presents: M E G A V O T E April 30, 2012

In this MegaVote for Georgia's 13th Congressional District:

Recent Congressional Votes:
* Senate: 21st Century Postal Service Act of 2012
* Senate: Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act of 2011
* House: Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act
* House: Interest Rate Reduction Act

The Senate and House are in recess this week.
They will return on Monday, May 7.

Recent Senate Votes:

21st Century Postal Service Act of 2012 http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=82&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Passed (62-37, 1 Not Voting)
The Senate passed its U.S. Postal Service overhaul bill. The bill seeks to trim the workforce by about 100,000 employees through attrition and delays efforts to eliminate Saturday delivery and close some post offices. The House has yet to pass its version of the bill. The postmaster estimates the agency needs to trim $22 billion in operating costs to remain in business. I find the description interesting, my understanding is that this bill is an easing of the recommended cuts.  No doubt the description overhaul is technically correct, but the real description would be adjustment.  Just watch, there will be very few office closings and Saturday service will continue.  Good for our Georgia men, if it ought to be whacked, do it, get the pain over with. 
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO

Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act of 2011 http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=87&chamber=S&congress=1122
Vote Passed (68-31, 1 Not Voting)
The Senate voted to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act for another five years. The 1994 law gives federal law enforcement agencies tools to combat crime against women. The reauthorization adds provisions relating to Native American and immigrant women, and sexual orientation. The House is likely to pass a bill similar to the current authorization.   I suspect more clever wording here, the addition of more classes of women, including "immigrants" (AKA ILLEGAL ALIENS) will be a back door of amnesty if the cause for swimming the Rio Grande of to escape persecution by El Hefe.
Sen. Saxby Chambliss voted NO
Sen. Johnny Isakson voted NO

Recent House Votes:

Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=192&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (248-168, 15 Not Voting)
This House bill directs the Director of National Intelligence to develop procedures to share cyber-threat information on a voluntary basis between the government's intelligence community and the private sector. The White House has threatened to veto the bill.  The private sector has the biggest barn door for cyber-threat and the best resources for corrective action.  Not so sure about this one.
Rep. David Scott voted NO


Interest Rate Reduction Act
http://capwiz.com/congressorg/issues/votes/?votenum=195&chamber=H&congress=1122
Vote Passed (215-195, 22 Not Voting) The House passed this bill that would keep the interest rate for government-subsidized student loans at 3.4 percent. The rate is scheduled to rise to 6.8 percent on July 1, 2012. To offset the estimated $6 billion cost of maintaining the current interest rate, the bill would repeal the $12 billion Prevention and Public Health Fund which was created by the 2010 health care reform bill. The White House supports keeping the current interest rate, but has threatened to veto this bill.   The apparent fight here is what to cut to pay for kissing young voters assess.  We know the answer from the Democrats, that being some pie in the sky tax we're going to extract from rich people.  The 6.8 value seems a little high for current interest rates, probably the high risk of payment failure is a factor.  Word is that there is about to be an avalanche of defaulted student loans.  My son graduated from college this past Saturday, he graduates with zero debt, not loans were taken, where is my government subsidy?  Crap like this contributes to spiralling tuition rates.  Ifthe risk to the lenders is proportional to failures, tough shit, pay the bill, you signed the agreement, pay your debt you whiny little bastards.
Rep. David Scott voted NO

MegaVote is powered by the CQ-Roll Call Group (http://corporate.cqrollcall.com) Copyright (c) 2012.
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Tuesday, May 1, 2012

drop the I word

Every now and then you run across progressive literature that illuminates the liberal thought process in a way that makes clear its lack of logic or accuracy. The web site ColorLines is place for such literature.
The authors at this site are attempting to rally support in a petition type call to sign on to a letter addressed to the Charlotte Observer. The intent being to modify the manner in which the publication refers to a beleaguered group. The body of the letter goes as follows....
I am writing to ask that the Charlotte Observer reporters and editors stop describing people as “illegal immigrants,” “illegal aliens,” and any other form of “illegal.” The i-word is dehumanizing, racially charged and masquerades as legal terminology, which it is not. There are terms like “unauthorized,” “undocumented,” and other precise, rational descriptions that can be used. The i-word denies people due process and is incompatible with ethical, professional journalistic standards.
The Society of Professional Journalists (SPJ) recently passed a resolution to discontinue use of the term “illegal alien.” They also suggested continued discussion to re-evaluate the use of “illegal immigrant,” which SPJ’s diversity committee advised against using because it is unconstitutional language and is offensive and dehumanizing to the people it describes. The Miami Herald, The San Antonio Express News and the New Haven Register have already changed their guidelines and we urge you to do so too.

The i-word inflames anti-immigrant rhetoric, which morphs into anti-Latino sentiment. Charlotte has the largest Latino community of the state’s ten largest cities, comprising 13.1% of the population, and North Carolina now ranks 11th in the nation in Latino residents. By dropping the i-word, the Observer can stop fueling hate and prejudice toward members of its own community.
The Charlotte Observer must not take part in misleading and inaccurate political rhetoric and the dehumanization of immigrants. Charlotte Observer, drop the i-word today.
There is a place where comments may be added in an attempt to personalize the message.   Around the greater web site I do see that it is not a fanatically obtuse set of articles.  The information is a viewpoint biased to the needs and beliefs of a group living within our borders. I might add ILLEGALLY to that last sentence, but living never the less.
In the letter to the editor there is described a liberal belief expressed by an organized group of journalists that are in the public representation supposed to be unbiased.  That is clearly not true, is it?  The journalists have already changed the description of a group of people that are described, labelled, by the actions completed.  Illegal is a description of behavior or choice, not the way a person is born. What is it in a journalist's psyche that compels him to obscure the description of what is real and accurate?
Listen up...
I am sorry that you take offense at being described by the actions you have made.
I am sorry that conditions in Mexico make the risk of illegal entrance and potential deportation an acceptable choice.
These are the ILLEGAL choices you have made, and a label earned by action.
Living in southern Cobb County there is a high number of ILLEGAL residents.  Taxes are paid by lawful residents to support services given to all of need. Overpopulation makes the services more difficult to attain, drives down property values and is a general pain the neck. 
Illegal is not a dehumanizing description, it is an adjective describing the person by actions he has completed.


Wake Me Up

Before you go girl...

"I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting."
Ronald Reagan

The man had no problem being self-deprecating.

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Ronald_Reagan