Three Kings

Little Johnny was sitting in class when the teacher asked him...
“Can you tell me the name of three great kings who have brought happiness and joy into people’s lives?”
To which little John replied...
“Smo-king, Drin-king and Fuc-king”

Put it Where?

The mortician calls Mrs. Smith, and says,
“Excuse me Mrs. Smith, but I can’t seem to close the lid to your husband’s coffin due to his enormous erection.”
To which she replies,
“Why don’t you cut it off and stick it up his ass? That’s the only hole in town it hasn’t been in.”

THWG

Football season is about to start and I just can't help myself.
The shirt is for real, can be ordered at Amazon.

What Difference Does It Make

Hillary Clinton goes to a gifted-student primary school in New York to talk about the world.
After her talk she offers question time.
One little boy puts up his hand. Hillary asks him what his name is.
"Kenneth," he says.
"And what is your question, Kenneth ?" she asks.
"I have three questions," he says.
"First, whatever happened in Benghazi ?"
"Second, why would you run for president if you are not capable of handling two e-mail accounts?"
"And third, whatever happened to the missing six billion dollars while you were secretary of state?"

Just then the bell rings for recess.
Hillary informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.

When they resume Hillary says,
"Okay, where were we ? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question ?"
A different boy, Little Johnny, puts his hand up.
Hillary points to him and asks him what his name is.
"Johnny," he says.
"And what is your question, Johnny ?" she asks.
"I have five questions," he says.
"First, whatever happened in Benghazi?"
"Second, why would you run for president if you are not capable of handling two e-mail accounts?"
"Third, whatever happened to the missing six billion dollars while you were secretary of state?"
"Fourth, why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early ?"
"And, fifth, where's Kenneth ?"

Polygamy Ban Blocked Muslim Immigration

A 100+ year old issue in the United States.

How America's Polygamy Ban Blocked Muslim Immigration

Daniel Greenfield, proprietor of Sultan Knish summarizes well with the statement...

A century ago and more, the nation had leaders who were not willing to dwell in the twilight of illusions, but who grappled with problems when they saw them. They saw civilization as fragile and vulnerable. They understood that the failure to address a conflict would mean a loss to the “enemies of civilization”. 

I have little doubt that in the bowels of government, there are people grappling with real problems, but the public facade of government seems obsessed  obscuring what is dangerous and what is not.

Red Herring issues abound...

• Arguments about what he minimum wage should be, when deduction shows that higher wages and the shallow end of the skill pool, leads to less employment.
• Arguments about levels of legal immigration, while the border stands porous, a victim of intentional neglect.
• Arguments over bathroom access, when in the end people will go where they have to, that is assuming the need overwhelms the desire to preen.
• Arguments over health care insurance, a tougher issue, but every person knows that government delivery systems, outside of checks being mailed, are the worst. Government intrusion will make health care worse, for all, sinking to the lowest common denominator.
• Global warming, a doubtful premise prima facie, conceptually I have no problem with engineering to maintain or lower heat generation, but pragmatic decisions on how that should affect the economy and industry should be left to anything but a governmental body. 

The current issues abound, in the end few of them will matter, but all obscure lurking catastrophes such as religious war, fiscal depression and loss of constitutional freedoms.

CBS News Deletes Poll Story

Found this little article via BadBlue.
CBS News Deletes Poll Story Crediting Trump for 5+ Point Lead in Pennsylvania; Mysteriously Vanished
A little more digging through the comments, reveals a copy found on the internet.
Archive
The deleted story says that Donald Trump is leading in Pennsylvania polls by 5 points, this is a critical state for the Republican candidate.
So much of this is the result of imprecise opinion, events misunderstood by readers reaching for proof of conspiracy.
That said, the network media is fighting for the Democrats can be accepted as fact, prima facie.
There are many reports floating about that Hillary is even in the polls in my state of Georgia. While I do live in a small world, evidence of this as fact is not plainly evident.

Vernon's Funeral

Vernon works hard at the Phone Company but spends two nights each week bowling, and plays golf every Saturday.
His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Vern! How ya doing?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
"Oh no," says Vern.”He's in my bowling league..."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Vern if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, “How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"
“I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golf club. I always have a Bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey."
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Vern, starts to rub herself all over him and says...
"Hi Vern. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"
Vern's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Vern follows and spots her getting into a cab.
Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
Vern tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book..
The cabby turns around and says,
'Geez Vern, you picked up a real bitch this time.'

VERN'S FUNERAL WILL BE FRIDAY AT 2:00 PM

Half is Less

Way late, but funny and pretty much applies to Hillary now that she's quit pretending to be moderate.

Hot Oil

Who am I?

Compliments of one of the nicest employees that I've had the pleasure to work with, Mr. Bob Schlag. This reminded me of my favorite Dr. Seuss children's books, Are You My Mother?. 

It seems that lately my life has been getting more complicated, and I want to thank those of you who are brave enough to still associate with me regardless of what I have become.

The following is a recap of my current identity:

• I was born white, which makes me a racist.
• I am a fiscal and moral conservative, which makes me a fascist.
• I am heterosexual, which makes me a homophobic.
• I am non-union, which makes me a traitor to the working class and an ally of big business.
• I am not a Muslim, which makes me an infidel.
• I am older than 50, which makes me a useless old person.
• I think and I reason; therefore I doubt much that the main stream media tells me, which makes me a reactionary.
• I am proud of my heritage and our inclusive American culture, which makes me a xenophobe.
• I value my safety and that of my family; therefore I appreciate the police and the legal system, which makes me a right-wing extremist.
• I believe in hard work, fair play, and fair compensation according to each individual's merits, which makes me anti-social.
• I, and my friends, acquired a good education without student loans and no debt at graduation, which makes me some kind of odd underachiever.
• I believe in the defense and protection of the homeland by all citizens, which makes me a militarist.

Please help me come to terms with this, because I‘m not sure who I am anymore!

• Newest problem – Now I'm not even sure which bathroom I should use.

Burkini Misdemeanors

Have to say that this is a little bit stupid.
If a person wants to wear pants and long sleeves while they go swimming, let them.
French police apprehend 10 Muslim women for wearing burkinis
As long as clothing does not infringe on identification or safety restrictions, and is considered publicly descent, folks should have the wear whatever they like.
Yes there have been horrible terrorism event in France this year, but we can be certain that the perpetrators were not wearing burkinis.

Election Fun Thoughts

If Hilary Clinton wins the U.S. Presidential election, it will mark the first time in history that two U.S. Presidents have slept together.
If Donald Trump wins the US Presidential election, it will mark the first time in history that a billionaire will move into public housing vacated by a black family.

Talkies

Before opening the link, I placed a personal bet against myself, guessing the race of the offender.

Shut the Hell Up

As the song goes, "I am the winner!".

Living in the south, this is a common occurrence that I've had the displeasure to experience.
Thinking about it though, I don't think the behavior is intended to offend, folks just act differently in public.

Obstruction of News

The site Creeping Sharia has article and linkage to Breitbart recordings.
A, five year old, developmentally challenged, girl was orally and anally raped by refugees.
The refugees have been placed in Twin Falls Idaho at the request of a business which receives kickbacks from the Federal government  to employ these individuals. The offenders were older children of these refugee employees.
Since the story broke there has been disinformation being put into the media flow that characterizes the complaining citizens of Twin Falls as bigots and worse.
Check out the article to read interview notes from the father of the girl and listen to the Breitbart interview of Lee Stranahan.
Also the reporting by Pamela Geller.
Some reporting from the left have been trying to dismiss to as the result of small town bigotry. Reporters such as Michelle Goldberg go to the trouble to hold up the superlative examples of successful refugees. I would not argue that most of the people that come from these countries are worthy of citizenship. But, a systemic failure to check for anti-social behaviors, also known as vetting, combined with a business objective of maximizing profit, creates mixture soup that is ripe for conflict between the an established culture and an invading culture. Government is constitutionally charged with protecting the citizens of the country, that is primary, for that due diligence is warranted.
Just be judicious.
In the end, why are these people more deserving of legal immigration status as compared to people who follow the rules. For people who follow the rules have a difficult and enduring path to complete for resident status and eventual citizenship, they are the ones who have to most to offer our society and are given the most rigorous tasks.
We have enough uneducated poor folks, why does the government insist on bringing in more, that are hostile to boot?

Hand Tool Definitions

Having worked many years as an mechanical engineer in a large equipment machine shop, learned that much of this is exactly right.

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted part which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, ''What the...??''
ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.
SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood blisters.
BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your
future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
WELDING GLOVES: Heavy duty leather gloves used to prolong the conduction of intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub you want the bearing race out of.
TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2X4: Used for levering an automobile upward off of a trapped hydraulic jack handle.
E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool ten times harder than any known drill bit that snaps neatly off in bolt holes thereby ending any possible future use.
BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.
CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 24-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A very large pry bar that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end opposite the handle.
AVIATION METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.
PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids and for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws.
PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.
HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.
MECHANIC''S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while wearing them.
DAMMIT TOOL: Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling ''DAMMIT'' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.

Turkey's Tradition of Murdering Christians

Remembering back to when I first started reading about the world Turkey could not decide if they wanted to hang with Russia or the United States. The country appeared then to be struggling with who they are. Is Turkey run by a secular government seemed to be the question. To me they were probably trying to be secular and failed, now they seem to be imploding on their religion of choice.
No, they should not be allowed free travel within the European Union countries.
Turkey's Tradition of Murdering Christians

Party Chat

This past weekend had a great talk with my brother that works in the city of Dubai. He is fairly defensive of and for his neighbors, an opinion for which I have high esteem. Apparently the Muslim unrest we see expressed as terrorism finds it's genesis in the deep poverty present in many Arab and African countries.
So having some, at least for me, some reinforced thoughts, we'll start with some basic points.
These are the first laws of Sharia that I have had the opportunity to read.

1. Theft is punishable by amputation of the right hand.
2. Criticizing or denying any part of the Quran is punishable by death.
3. Criticizing Muhammad or denying that he is a prophet is punishable by death.
4. Criticizing or denying Allah, the god of Islam is punishable by death.
5. A Muslim who becomes a non-Muslim is punishable by death.
6. A non-Muslim who leads a Muslim away from Islam is punishable by death.
7. A non-Muslim man who marries a Muslim woman is punishable by death.
8. A man can marry an infant girl and consummate the marriage when she is 9 years old.
9. Girls' clitoris should be cut (Muhammad's words, Book 41, Kitab Al-Adab, Hadith 5251).
10. A woman can have 1 husband, who can have up to 4 wives; Muhammad can have more.
11. A man can beat his wife for insubordination.
12. A man can unilaterally divorce his wife; a woman needs her husband's consent to divorce.
13. A divorced wife loses custody of all children over 6 years of age or when they exceed it.
14. Testimonies of four male witnesses are required to prove rape against a woman.
15. A woman who has been raped cannot testify in court against her rapist(s).
16. A woman's testimony in court, allowed in property cases, carries ½ the weight of a man's.
17. A female heir inherits half of what a male heir inherits.
18. A woman cannot drive a car, as it leads to fitnah (upheaval).
19. A woman cannot speak alone to a man who is not her husband or relative.
20. Meat to eat must come from animals that have been sacrificed to Allah - i.e., be "Halal".
21. Muslims should engage in Taqiyya and lie to non-Muslims to advance Islam.

K.A. says that in the UAE, laws are divided into three sections. Those sections are social, religious and governmental. Governmental has primacy. The country is well organized and application of laws would be considered fair by Western standards. In the poorer countries law keeping is dominated by religious leaders, and like we see in politics all over the world, poor people are given abstract targets onto which to blame for the pain in their lives.