Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Nine More Important Facts To Remember As We Grow Older




#9  Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
 
#8  Life is sexually transmitted.
 
#7  Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
 
#6   Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
 
#5  Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
 
#4  Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
 
#3  All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
 
#2  In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
 
#1  Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow. 
 
Please share this wisdom with others while I go to the bathroom.

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