Saturday, February 21, 2009

Sea Kittens

Looked for information on PETA's promotional campaign after reading a comment in the National Review. A Google "Sea Kitten" search took me right to PETA's site and headlining is a new thrust aimed at children. The description of the campaign reads....
People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.

How cute, they nibble at your feet.
Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?

Only a woman could have written this drivel. And don't forget boys and girls, before hooking the fish you have to run that hook through the worm a couple of times too. In a section labelled "Sea Kitten Facts", cute little crappola text streams by.....
Many male sea kittens woo potential partners by singing to them. While this
is not particularly easy to do underwater coherently, female sea kittens don't
generally seem to mind.

The song they are singing is "Fry Me To The Moon", and....
Sea kittens talk to each other through squeaks, squeals, and other low-frequency sounds that humans can only hear through special instruments. Most ichthyologists—scientists who specialize in sea kitten biology—agree that this is just about the cutest thing ever.

It's just about the cutest thing ever, the squeak bluefish make when you smash their head with a club. And.....
Contrary to popular belief, the technical term for sea kitten offspring is "baby sea kitties," not "caviar." Many sea kittens build nests where they can raise their baby sea kitties, and others collect small rocks off the sea floor to make widdle hiding pwaces where they can rest.

We wurk hard to fine dose wittle pwaces wid owr depth finer.

This thing just goes on and on and on. The bullshit is so deep you need a shovel to cut a path through it. The objective is clear enough, emulate the Disney Nemo movie to draw in kids, then teach the children that fishing harms fish. I agree, it does harm fish, got no problem with it. Fish taste good and by our good luck are often nourishing, furthermore fishing is relaxing for the soul.

PETA is drawing on kids to develop their long range objective of animal rights equalling those for people. Have you seen what little kids insist on eating, hot dogs, made from the parts of every living animal known to man, and macaroni and cheese made from milk and milk derivatives. Kids learn to love tasty flesh at an early age.

These folks probably rode to school on the short bus.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Show me the love. Serious, even disagreeable comments are not moderated.